I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
