so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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