you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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