When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Randomize
