just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
