Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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