I wanna passion pit in your ass
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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