You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
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Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
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I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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