is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
