How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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