what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
