You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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