I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
We got so high we made milksteak
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
