FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
