wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
