did you get engaged???
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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