Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
