I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
