put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
