Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
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