There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Randomize
