sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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