Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
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