we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize