when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
