You really coming over, don't trick.
thus making me awesome and them whores
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
