He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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