Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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