Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
