The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
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