Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
