Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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