I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
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