I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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