Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
