That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I just found puke in my bra..
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
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