i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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