Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."