did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
