dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
