You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
