oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
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