I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
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Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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