He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
