yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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