I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Randomize
