I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize