My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Randomize
