you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
