dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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